The Darkness Inside
by Tatsurou-san
Summary: Lina makes a startling discovery about herself that could change everything...or not. It is Lina, after all.
1. Chapter 1

The Darkness Inside

Lina Inverse was walking with her friends Gourry Gabriev, Xelgadis Greyswords, and Amelia Sayroon along an unexplored path. Just another day in an adventurous life. Then the bandits showed up.

Lina smirked. "Well, what do you know. Bandits. This should be fun...and profitable!" She readied her magic, as did Amelia and Xelgadis. Gourry drew his sword.

The bandits didn't bother to issue challenges, or even speak. They simply charged in. Lina and her compatriots knocked and blasted them back as best they could, but they kept getting back up and charging again.

Lina was breathing heavily. Using this much magic was tiring her. "They just won't give up!"

"Miss Lina!" Amelia called out. "I believe the bandit's are under some sort of spell! Someone else is manipulating them to-KYAH!" She fell to the side, a large gash down her arm and torso from a lucky sword strike.

"AMELIA!" Xelgadis called out, charging in and knocking the bandit away with sheer brute force. He crouched over Amelia, attempting to heal the injury, letting his stone skin blunt the blows directed his way. The swords weren't that sharp, and the bandits weren't that strong.

Lina leapt above the melee, shouting, "Ray Wing!" FLoating over the melee, she sought out the puppet master. She saw the man...but he wasn't a man. She floated over. "Heh, why do WE merit the attention of a member of the Monster Race, hmm?"

The Monster glared at her. "For your crimes against us, Lina Inverse, you will die this day...along with your friends." The monster started throwing blasts of magic at her.

She tried her best to dodge, but she could feel herself getting sluggish. Her magic was starting to weaken, and she was starting to feel the beginning of cramps. *No! Not now!* she thought desperately. Was it that time of the month already? If they didn't get away soon, she was dead! And-

"GYAHH!" Her thoughts were cut short as a blast of magic punched through her abdomen. She clutched at the wound, falling to the ground. Gourry caught her before she landed.

"Lina! Are you alright?" He watched her with concern, not seeing the Monster raising his hands to deliver a final blow.

"NO!" she shouted, throwing a hand forward to stop him, calling forth any magic she could command to stop the monster.

A blast of raw mystic energy leapt forth from her hand, consuming the monster totally, punching right through all his barriers. He didn't even have time to scream.

Lina stared at her hand in shock, not knowing where that magic had come from. Then the pain of her wound recaptured her attention. She looked down as she clutched her injury.

Where she should have seen blood and damaged internal organs...she saw only a black void.

She stared in shock, not knowing what was going on. Then, as she heard Gourry trying to get her attention, and Amelia stirring under Xelgadis' care, a niggling memory worked its way to the surface of her mind. She had seen wounds like this before.

Leaping out of Gourry's arms, she turned and fled, not knowing she vanished into thin air a few steps away. She ran from her friends, ran from the knowledge of what this meant...ran from a future that no longer had hope.

She ran, and ran, and ran. Finally she stumbled and fell.

She was in the middle of a forest she didn't recognize. Glanicng around, she saw nothing. She couldn't even feel the beginning of the cramps anymore. Lost, scared, and for the first time in a long time totally alone, Lina Inverse - Bandit Killer, Dragon Spooker, slayer of Demon Lords - broke down and cried.

"Hmm? What's this then? However did you come to be here, Miss Lina? And what makes you so sad?"

She turned, and saw Xellos. She glared at him for a time. "Just leave me alone!" she shouted at the top of her voice, turning her back on him.

"Now what kind of friend would I be if I did that, hmm?" he asked, floating down to her. "I'm somewhat curious as to how you reached here, anyway, as it can only be reached through the Astral Plain-" He fell silent, staring at his staff. The crystal at the top had begun to glow. He kneeled down next to her, and gazed at the wound in her side.

She glared at him. "What? You think I don't know what this means? I don't know how, but somehow I'm a member of the Monster Race! Only Monsters generate their own magic and look like voids of darkness inside when injured. But I was human!" She broke down again. "I never made a deal, I never made a contract...how the hell did I become a Monster?"

Xellos sighed, and extended a hand. Healing energy came from his hand, flowing into Lina and sealing the wound. She stared at him. He stood up. "Walk with me, Lina. We need to talk."

She got up, glaring at him suspiciously. "Is this gonna be one of those conversations where I ask you the big important questions and you answer with 'IT's...a secret!' again? Cause I'm seriously not in the mood." She'd managed to shove aside her sorrow for the moment, using anger as a crutch to hold herself together.

"I give you my word that at no point in this conversation will I utter those words. If I know the answer to your questions, I will tell you, completely and honestly."

She followed after him, stunned. Not sure what else to say, she started with her most pressing question. "What am I?"

"My daughter," Xellos replied bluntly.

Lina walked into a tree. "Say what?"

"Just under a decade ago, I found myself...seduced by a single mother. Her daughter was a young girl named Luna. The - now late, I believe - Miss Inverse knew what I was...and did not care. I had stopped in at her establishment for a light snack, and some men were giving her trouble regarding a debt. I assisted her, and she was ever so grateful." Xellos sighed, almost regretfully. "A beautiful woman, she was...although I never learned her name. When I met you, and learned of your sister, I thought it was just coincidence. I know now I was mistaken."

Lina stared at Xellos - her FATHER - as she walked. "I'm...a hybrid?"

"Yes. Half-human, half-monster. The best of both worlds, in a way. YOu have th ability to use human magic, and your form is fully human. At the same time, you have a Monster's ability to generate your own reserves of mana, your own spell set, and are able to maintain your physiology like a monster." He gestured to where her wound was no longer present.

She thought about this for a time. "How...how long will I live?"

"As long as you choose to, I'd imagine. Much the same as any Monster. You will also age - or not - as you choose, now that your heritage has awoken."

"Awoken? YOu mean this might not have happened?"

Xellos smiled sadly. "You have been touched directly by the power of the Lord of Nightmare's. I'm afriad with your heritage, after that this was inevitable."

"But..." She stared out at the strange/familiar woods. "What do I do now?"

"Whatever you wish, I imagine. I hope you can forgive my lack of awareness as to our connection, but I did not know until your monster abilities awoke."

Lina chuckled. "Well, you're not going to win any Father of the Year awards, that's for certain."

Xellos laughed with her. "Would you like to go back to your friends? I am sure they are worried about you."

"But...I'm a Monster. Won't they-"

"Hate you? Because you are born to a race of beings that were made to destroy? Lina, think about all you have done when you thought you were human, the kind of life you have led. Does knowing what you are now change any of that?"

Lina thought for a time. "You mean...if they still don't hate me after all this time, what change could this possibly bring?"

"Something like that, yes."

Lina shook her head sadly. "I've been pretty terrible, haven't I?"

"Yes. You've been a very naughty girl. I may have to put you over my knee."

"Just try it!"

Laughing together they vanished into the Astral Plain.

"LINA! LINA!" GOurry was searching the area for Lina, with Amelia and Xelgadis' help. Suddenly a distortion appeared in the air, and Lina and Xellos appeared.

"Lina!" GOurry cried happily, running up and hugging her. AMelia did so as well.

Xelgadis came up close. "Don't go disappearing like that, you had us worried."

Xellos smiled. "I'll leave you with your friends, then. I'll pop in every now and then to teach you what you need to know...assuming you don't figure it out on your own."

Lina smiled. It seemed that her friends hadn't figured it out. But she decided they deserved to know...everything. She waved to Xellos. "Thanks...Dad."

Smiling, Xellos vanished.

"DAD?" the others demanded, shocked.

Lina smiled. "It's a LOOOONG story..." 


	2. Chapter 2

The Darkness Inside 2

Lina lay back against a tree, watching the campfire. She glanced around at the sleeping forms of her friends. She knew, now, that she didn't deserve such good friends. Even knowing what they did now about her, nothing had changed between them. Xelgadis had treated it like it wasn't news at all. Amelia had taken her usual stance about the power of truth, justice, love, friendship...basically, nothing different there. Gourry had been the real surprise.

SHe glanced down at the blonde swordsman, the first friend she had made on her adventure. Once, she had even entertained romantic feelings towards him, but she knew now that would never have worked. Firstly, his idiocy ignored the heck out of her. Second, he really needed someone who could take care of him, and she wasn't a nurturing sort of person. And finally, Xellos had mentioned that she would probably live a very long time, which in her mind meant she would outlive Gourry, and if they got together, probably any children they had.

"Gee, Dad," she said to the shadows. "I suppose you could have made it a bit clearer that I might as well abandon any hope of a normal romantic relationship. But then again, you always loved secrets." She noticed a swirl of shadows above her. "Speak of the devil, and he shall appear, am I right?"

"Now is that any way to talk to your father, Lina?" Xellos appeared in the air above the fire, then floated over to sit beside her. "If you're being naughty, I may have to put you over my knee."

Lina snorted indelicately. "I'd like to see you try!"

Xellos was quiet for a while. "I know humans have diverse interests when it comes to mating behavior, but I hope you know I don't see you that-"

"EEWWW! DAD!" Lina pushed Xellos away. "I didn't mean it like that!"

Xellos took a deep breath. "That's a relief. It could have been quite awkward otherwise."

Lina laughed at his discomfiture. "So why are you here, anyway?"

"I told you, Lina, I was going to teach you about how to use your newly awakened powers."

"But why now? It's the middle of the night."

"Well, aside from the fact that you don't need to sleep anymore-"

"I was wondering about that!"

"-Monster abilities are strongest in darkness," Xellos finished. "This will make it easier for you to learn new spells and techniques, as well as learning to FEEL your monster blood, and assume your Monster form."

Lina blinked for a bit, taking this in. "I have a Monster form?"

Xellos shook a finger at her. "In time I will teach you to grasp that...but not until you have enough grasp of your powers that you will be able to resume your human form without messing up." He glanced towards her friends. "How did they take it, by the way? Since you are still travelling with them, I assume they accepted it?"

Lina opened her mouth to tell him.

"No, don't tell me." He gestured towards the smoke coming up from the fire. "Show me. Feel the darkness inside you, and take hold of it. WHen it comes to you, take hold of the memory of the event, and project it into the smoke."

Lina looked at him, then closed her eyes. Deep inside, there was a pool of darkness. It seemed to be deeper than she could imagine, but it just sat there, waiting. Reaching out in her mind, she called to it.

The darkness rose from the pool slowly, reaching up to touch the hand of her mind. It felt cool and damp, but not unpleasantly so, almost like a lick from a friendly dog. She giggled as it caressed her mind, pouring through her being. SHe had expected it to gush like a river breaking from a dam, overwhelming her. But it came slowly, almost nervously. It felt almost like a lover's caress...at least, according to what she'd read in those romance novels she'd never admit to owning.

Once she felt she had gathered enough of the darkness into her mind, she opened her eyes. The world seemed different. She didn't just see the phyysical world around her. She also saw the flow of magic through the air, and the people around her.

She saw the magic that clung to Gourry from all the times he had wielded the Sword of Light, and every spell he had been a part of. She saw the bright flare of white and black magic coming from Amelia, tempered by the innocent purity of her soul and outlook on life. She saw the raw power of the spiritual magic at Xelgadis' command, and even the shape of the golem curse afflicting him. She even saw its cure, which was so simple and yet so profound it was all she could do not to laugh aloud.

"It seems you have it," Xellos said, and she turned to face him...and almost lost her grip on the magic.

She didn't just see his human form. She saw the strength of the magic at his command, how much he had held back since she'd met him. SHe saw his true form, the swirling cone of darkness. She saw the bonds of his service to Zelus, and an older bond, going beyond even the Ruby Eyed Lord's origins.

Xellos smiled. "Most can't see as deep into me as you are now. It's our shared blood, I'd imagine." He gestured to the smoke. "Give the spell a try."

Nodding, Lina turned back to the smoke. Focusing on the memory of that afternoon, she willed it into the smoke. The smoke took shape, and an image appeared. Lina was talking to her friends, explaining what had happened.

"...so that's everything. I'm a Monster/human hybrid, and Xellos is apparantely my father. It came as much of a surprise to him as it did to me. Apparently Luna's only my half sister. Anyway, my Monster blood has awoken now, and with it the abilities of that side of my heritage. Xellos is going to be teaching me about that, and how to control it." She shrugged her shoulders. "And that's everything."

Everyone was quiet for a while. Zelgadis spoke first, closing his eyes and smirking. "YOu know, that explains a lot."

Lina glared at him. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Just what I said. A lot of things I'd wondered about where it comes to you make sense now." He smiled at her. "It's actually a releif finding out the explanation is something so simple. Most of my theories were...fairly exotic."

"Fear not, Miss Lina!" Amelia spoke up. "Although this revelation of heritage may have left you shaken and disturbed, the power of friendship and justice will not allow you to fall to darkness and despair! You have proven yourself a staunch ally of justice time and again, and I see nothing here that should change this in the future, for not even the darkest Monster can stand against the power of Justice!"

Lina and Zelgadis sweatdropped at this.

Gourry was looking highly confused. "I'm not sure I followed all of that."

"I'm not surprised," Lina said. "Amelia can be hard to follow sometimes."

"I meant what you were talking about, Lina."

Lina sweatdropped. "Again, not surprised. Well, ask whatever questions are most pressing, and I'll try to answer so that you can understand."

"Okay." Gourry thought long and hard. "Are you still you?"

Lina blinked for a time, then shrugged. "Well, I guess so. I mean, I don't feel like I'm any different."

"Okay," Gourry nodded. "Then does it matter?"

Everyone stared at Gourry. "Umm...I think I need you to trot THAT one by ME again, Gourry," Lina said, blinking a few times.

"Well," Gourry said, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world, "if it hasn't changed who you are, then why should we care? You're still you, we're still us, so what does it matter?"

The smoke image vanished as Lina lost her focus, wiping away a tear that she would vehemently deny existed if Xellos commented on it.

Xellos just nodded. "You've chosen your friends well, Lina." He smiled at her. "You will go far with them. I am certain you will leave a legacy."

Lina nodded. "So any more lessons tonight?"

"No." Xellos patted her on the shoulder. "You have learned to touch your well of darkness at need, and to manipulate for simple spells. Most Monsters take weeks to master that when they first wield their magic."

She shrugged. "The darkness felt friendly."

He stared at her for a time, then began to chuckle. "How lovely. Few monsters are as lucky as you with their power. If the darkness comes so easily to you, I can easily see you equalling the Greater Monsters eventually. I look forward to seeing how far you go." Xellos floated into the air. "Good night, Lina."

"Xellos!" Lina called, and he stopped. "Are...are monsters capable of love?"

Xellos thought for a time. "It is not the same as human love, but yes, we are. It is more intellectual than emotional at the outermost, and far more elemental at the deepest levels, but yes, we do have that emotion."

"Oh." She got a little nervous. "Um...do you..." She couldn't phrase ehr question.

She didn't need to. Xellos smiled. "Lina, you are my beloved only daughter. Never forget that." With that, he vanished.

Lina smiled. "Goodnight, Da. ...love you, too."

She leaned back against the tree, and gazed into the fire. 


End file.
